my type

how do i manage to become so over invested in someone who is barely there. a faint outline of a potential. a whispered type. my heart beats fast and my breath aches. dressed as a nerd because it is the trend on my skin. my eyes bleed and i pour the third cup of black down my throat. it satisfies nothing. how did i let the so unknown become so important. why do i care? and yet i am lying and wishing that i could ventriloquist your ass and force your lips into the 'N' and wait for you to understand.